Quote
"The outer situation of your life. And whatever happens there is like the surface of the lake sometimes calm sometimes windy and rough according to the cycles and season but deep down however the lake is always undisturbed. You are the whole lake not just the surface." Eckhart Tolle
For most people the chaos and noise happening around them and within their own minds feels like all there is. They live in a constant state of reactivity being pushed and pulled by the thoughts and emotions that they're experiencing in any moment.
They're controlled by a voice in their head that worries about everything that can go wrong, criticises them for everything that they do wrong and feels guilty or angry about everything that went wrong.
This voice interprets every situation instantaneously and we don't question it just like we don't question our breathing.
It happens unconsciously meaning we're unaware of it and then we feel and act based on the voices interpretation.
The truth is that everyone has a voice in their head including you. What you may not realise is that this voice is your ego.
Some people's voices are nicer than others but everyone's voice tends to have the same dysfunction.
But the good news and perhaps the best news anyone can ever hear is that the voice is not who you are for some of you, you already know this very well. And for others it might be the first time that you've heard it. Or perhaps the first time you truly understand it.
If you've ever argued with yourself or you've ever noticed yourself thinking about something ridiculous or you've ever talked to yourself in your own mind then you've experienced that there are two of you.
There's the one that's doing the thinking feeling and reacting. And then there is the one that is aware of the thoughts emotions and reactions - in truth you are that awareness.
You are the presence that witnesses the voice. You are not the voice.
I am going to repeat that - You are the presence that witnesses the voice. You are not the voice.
As horse people we often act or react from this voice - believing that it is awareness - but it isn't.
You are not the Voice - Knowing this allows you to observe what your inner voice is doing and thinking and this is called self observation or self awareness.
And as you become more and more aware of what has always been going on unconsciously beneath the surface of your awareness you become conscious.
You wake up from the dream and the process for developing this awareness is called mindfulness that develops self awareness and mindfulness.
This is where your horse lives, and this is where he wants your partnership, your relationship to be - In Awareness, In Observation, In Presence.
However, like most of us - you will likely live much of your life on autopilot feeling like you have little control over your thoughts emotions or your life.
The truth is that unless you know what you're thinking, feeling, you're doing, you have no way of changing it.
Simply developing this awareness is the key that unlocks all of your power to direct your own inner voice. Choose better feeling emotions and make better decisions. And your horse will be grateful, your self belief will grow and your confidence will soar.
So start by listening to the voice in your head as often as you can pay particular attention to any thoughts that tend to repeat themselves over and over and over and over again, especially when you are with your horse and in the saddle.
Be the observer of what is happening inside of you both on the surface of the lake and the depths.
See if you can find and feel the deep calm at the bottom of the lake even when the surface is rough as you practice mindfulness and observing your thoughts and reactions you'll be better able to recognise even more clearly that the presence doing the observing is the true you.
Just this simple change, can bring about a huge change in your relationship with your horse.
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Chanti teaches EquiMinds Horsemanship Coaching and EquiMinds Mindset Transformation Coaching for Anxious, Nervous and Scared Owners and Riders
Anxiety, intimidation, fear; whatever you call it ... you can overcome it.
Get in touch for either a 1 to 1 in person session or an online video call session and no matter what type of horse person you are, non rider, happy hacker or wannabe equestrian - everyone is welcome.
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